Try Grass ....

[SamLouise]

.... no, not the illegal stuff that fools smoke!  ;D

I'm not even slightly religious so I take no responsibility for the sermon, just found it to be quite true, really, LOL  ;D ;) :-X

GOD:  "Frank,  you know all about gardens and nature.  What in the world is going on down there on the  planet? What happened to the dandelions, violets, thistle and stuff I started eons ago?  I had a perfect no-maintenance garden plan. Those  plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with  abandon.  The nectar from the long-lasting blossoms attracts  butterflies, honey bees and flocks of songbirds.  I expected to see  a vast garden of colours by now.  But, all I see are these green  rectangles."
 
St. FRANCIS: "It's the  tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They started calling  your flowers "weeds" and went to great lengths to kill them and  replace them with grass."

GOD:   "Grass?  But, it's so boring.  It's not colourful.   It doesn't attract butterflies, birds and bees; only grubs and sod  worms.  It's sensitive to temperatures.  Do these Suburbanites  really want all that grass growing there?"

ST. FRANCIS:   "Apparently so, Lord.  They go to great pains to grow it  and keep it green.  They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and  poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn."
 
GOD:   "The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow  really fast.  That must make the Suburbanites happy." 

ST. FRANCIS:   "Apparently not, Lord.  As soon as it grows a little,  they cut it-sometimes twice a week."
 
GOD:   "They cut it?  Do they then bale it like hay?"

ST. FRANCIS:  "Not  exactly, Lord.  Most of them rake it up and put it in bags."

GOD:   "They bag it?  Why?  Is it a cash crop?  Do  they sell it?"

ST. FRANCIS:  "No,  Sir, just the opposite.  They pay to throw it away." .

GOD:  "Now,  let me get this straight.  They fertilize grass so it will grow and  when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?"

ST. FRANCIS:  "Yes,  Sir."

GOD:   "These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut  back on the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and  saves them a lot of work."           

ST. FRANCIS:  "You  aren't going to believe this, Lord.  When the grass stops growing so  fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it so they can  continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it."
 
GOD:   "What nonsense.  At least they kept some of the trees.   That was a sheer stroke of genius, if I do say so myself.  The  trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the  summer.  In the autumn, they fall to the ground and form a natural  blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes.  It's a natural cycle of life."

St. FRANCIS:  "You  better sit down, Lord.  The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle.   As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay  to have them hauled away."
 
GOD:   "No! What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in  the winter to keep the soil moist and loose?"

ST. FRANCIS:  "After throwing  away the leaves, they go out and buy something which they call mulch.   They haul it home and spread it around in place of the  leaves."

GOD:   "And where do they get this mulch?"

ST. FRANCIS:  "They  cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch." 

GOD:   "Enough!  I don't want to think about this anymore.  St. Catherine, you're in charge  of the arts.  What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?"

ST. CATHERINE:  "Dumb  and Dumber, Lord.  It's a story about..." 

GOD:   "Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St.  Francis."   

[SamLouise]

[rosebud]

How true is that!!!!. Says i shame faced. :-[

[cornykev]

Like it Blue.  ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

[lorna]

Makes ya fink don't it SB?