News:

Picture posting is enabled for all :)

Main Menu

Corny joke challenge

Started by carolinej, March 27, 2008, 07:53:25

Previous topic - Next topic
Print
Go Down Pages 1 2 3 4
User actions

sheddie

#20
March 27, 2008, 22:07:42
Two fish are in a tank and one turns to the other and says - do you have any idea how to drive this thing?...

Why are pirates called pirates? - because they aaarrrrgggghhhh..

Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshiper? - he sold his soul to Santa..

Why did the lepper fail his driving test? - he left his foot on the clutch..

When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

sheddie

#20
March 27, 2008, 22:07:42
When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

sheddie

#21
March 27, 2008, 22:09:29
And almost forgot! - what happened to the constipated mathemetician? - how worked it out with a pencil...

sorry, awful I know ;D
When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

bison1947

#22
March 27, 2008, 22:17:35
A man went to a fortune teller and said id like my palm read

so she hit it with a hammer....

Deb P

#23
March 27, 2008, 22:35:34
Quote from: sheddie on March 27, 2008, 22:07:42

Why are pirates called pirates? - because they aaarrrrgggghhhh..

Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshiper? - he sold his soul to Santa..



;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;DThey get my vote............... ;D ;D ;D
If it's not pouring with rain, I'm either in the garden or at the lottie! Probably still there in the rain as well TBH....🥴

http://www.littleoverlaneallotments.org.uk

kt.

#24
March 27, 2008, 22:57:30
Where does a whale go to get weighed?

To the whale weigh station 8) 8) 8)
All you do and all you see is all your life will ever be

sheddie

#25
March 27, 2008, 23:10:34
ow - that almost hurt!

- I rang up a local builder the other day and said - I want a skip outside my house - he said, well - I'm not stopping you...

- someone complimented me on my driving today -  They left a little note on the windscreen; it said 'Parking Fine'....

A man walked into the doctors and said - I've hurt my arm in several places - the doctor said, well don't go to those places...

What do you call an exciting mushroom? - a fun-gi to be with...

they get worse... ;D
When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

carolinej

#26
March 27, 2008, 23:14:15
This is such fun ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

I think I may have strained my gigglethalmus ;D ;D

cj :)

Slug_killer

#27
March 27, 2008, 23:37:13
One that's been done before ...

You can take horticulture, but you cant make her appreciate it
When Santa's about, just hoe-hoe-hoe

Pita

#28
March 28, 2008, 08:59:39
Whats the difference between a rifle with a bent  barrell  and a constipated owl,
one can shoot but can't hit and the other..........................
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

Gazfoz

#29
March 28, 2008, 12:37:05
A man opened a pub on the Moon but he came back because there was no atmosphere.

Gazfoz

#30
March 28, 2008, 12:41:18
One for the watershed ;)

What's the differance between an acrobat and the folies bergere?
One's a cunning display of stunts.................................. ;D ;D ;D :-X

cleo

#31
March 28, 2008, 15:09:45
Why do people laugh when they walk into a field of wheat?




















It`s a corny joke

Rhubarb Thrasher

#32
March 28, 2008, 15:32:58
what do you call a Frenchman wearing beach sandals?

Phillipe Flop

markfield rover

#33
March 28, 2008, 15:41:10
So RT, what if he has two left feet?

Rhubarb Thrasher

#34
March 28, 2008, 15:47:24
Quote from: markfield rover on March 28, 2008, 15:41:10
So RT, what if he has two left feet?

then he's Kevin Keegan's new striker

markfield rover

#35
March 28, 2008, 15:55:10
Walked into that one -very good.

Plot69

#36
March 28, 2008, 18:07:01
Two blonde women walked into a bar...
You'd have thought one of them would have seen it.

I used to be a parrot but I'm alright now.
I used to be a parrot but I'm alright now.
I used to be a parrot but I'm alright now.
I used to be a parrot but I'm alright now.
I used to be a parrot but I'm alright now.

What do you call a girl standing between two posts?
Annette.

What do you call a girl with a radiator on her back?
Anita.

What do you call Englands new manager?
Call him anything, he won't understand you!


Another for the watershed.

What's the difference between a pregnant women and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.




Tony.

Sow it, grow it, eat it.

Rhubarb Thrasher

#37
March 28, 2008, 18:13:23
King Wenceslas goes into Pizzahut, and the waiter says - The usual?, and King Wenceslas says - Yes please, Deep-pan, crisp and even.

Gazfoz

#38
March 28, 2008, 19:44:26
Like that one rhubarb ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

carolinej

#39
March 28, 2008, 21:43:02
What do you call a chicken that  crosses the road?




Poultry in motion ;D

cj :)
Print
Go Up Pages 1 2 3 4
User actions
Powered by EzPortal